I never know how to act around people I just met. Or barley met. Or hardley know.
Most of my close friends couldn't stand me the first time they met me.
Yes, this includes the love of my life, a Mr. Elias Hernandez.
But I guess it goes back to high school......
Insert flashback noise from Waynes World.....no? Moving on.
I was a terrible person back in high school. I mean wow. Just awful. My mouth is what got the best of me. Either horrible rumors and gossip behind people back, or snarky sarcastic remarks in front if people I was MEAN! Whenever I met someone, I could not look past their faults. Anyone. If I saw someone I would automatically think of something I don't like about them. It was bad.
Eventually I let God take care of me. By the end of senior year I had done some damage control and cut some fat from my friends. I ended up with only 3 friends at my high school. Yup 3. That's it.
Love those three girls. You know who you are.
So, in letting God get a hold of my heart I learned some hard truths. One, I really didn't like myself. Anything about myself. I guess I shouldn't used past tense.....well....okay I mean.....I'm better. Like I don't want you to think....I don't know how to explain this....
To be fair the title did warn you about the awkwardness.
I like the person God is making me into. But every now and then, old Elisa creeps back in. And there go those negative thoughts.
So why am I socailly awkward?
When I get around a new group of people heres what I think:
1. Who do I want to be around these people? (Funny, smart, artsy, girly, ditsy, witty, independant, or a mixture of Elisa's)
2. How can I make it so when people won't talk about me behind my back? (This comes from years of damage of talking mad you-know-what behind my new peoples backs.)
3. How can I do all of this without being too obvious and awkward?
Hmmm. Someone has taken their daily ounce of crazy today.
There it is.
I don't know why I wrote this. :)
But there I am in a nutshell. All exposed and raw out there for the world to see.
Enjoy my friends, enjoy.
Most of my close friends couldn't stand me the first time they met me.
Yes, this includes the love of my life, a Mr. Elias Hernandez.
But I guess it goes back to high school......
Insert flashback noise from Waynes World.....no? Moving on.
I was a terrible person back in high school. I mean wow. Just awful. My mouth is what got the best of me. Either horrible rumors and gossip behind people back, or snarky sarcastic remarks in front if people I was MEAN! Whenever I met someone, I could not look past their faults. Anyone. If I saw someone I would automatically think of something I don't like about them. It was bad.
Eventually I let God take care of me. By the end of senior year I had done some damage control and cut some fat from my friends. I ended up with only 3 friends at my high school. Yup 3. That's it.
Love those three girls. You know who you are.
So, in letting God get a hold of my heart I learned some hard truths. One, I really didn't like myself. Anything about myself. I guess I shouldn't used past tense.....well....okay I mean.....I'm better. Like I don't want you to think....I don't know how to explain this....
To be fair the title did warn you about the awkwardness.
I like the person God is making me into. But every now and then, old Elisa creeps back in. And there go those negative thoughts.
So why am I socailly awkward?
When I get around a new group of people heres what I think:
1. Who do I want to be around these people? (Funny, smart, artsy, girly, ditsy, witty, independant, or a mixture of Elisa's)
2. How can I make it so when people won't talk about me behind my back? (This comes from years of damage of talking mad you-know-what behind my new peoples backs.)
3. How can I do all of this without being too obvious and awkward?
Hmmm. Someone has taken their daily ounce of crazy today.
There it is.
I don't know why I wrote this. :)
But there I am in a nutshell. All exposed and raw out there for the world to see.
Enjoy my friends, enjoy.