Silly Conversations

Anyone else get like hyper focused on becoming an author from grades 3-6? Like, you write a 6 page book about some weird fantasy character and then try to write some sequels thinking you were the next big name in fantasy novels? And then you kind of just forgot about them and fixated on some other random passion, like theater, or art, or marine biology? Just me? I don't really know what I am supposed to do with writing. I have a weird calling to write stuff, but like what? I have no clue.  Can I tell you a slightly weird, embarrassing story?  So when I was maybe 7 or 8, my mom was a camp director at a summer camp called Quaker Meadow. It's a camp that she had been working at since she was a teenager and, if I remember correctly, this was the first year I could be an actual camper. I don't have much of a memory from any of it really-- as my long term memory is spotty at best-- but I remember having quite the fun time. It was a church camp, so there was a lot of those typical...

"I am happier than a teacher on summer break!" -someone who has never taught. This is my 6th summer break as a full time teacher. And I should be thrilled to be on summer break, right?! I'm just not though. Here's my issue: I want to do so much. SO MUCH. I want to write. I want to read. I want to plan. I want to study. I want to chill. I want to sleep. I want to work out. I want to hang with friends. I want to teach my toddler things. I want to date my husband. I want to clean. I want to eat healthy. I want to meal prep. I want to start a project. I want to FINISH a project. I want to practice self care. I want doing creative stuff. I want to do some work stuff. And I want to start AND FINISH it all right now! But it's such a huge list, that I get overwhelmed and don't do any of it. I always feel like "I have all summer!" And then- I feel like you don't have to be super observant to know what's coming- SUMMER ENDS,...

How does tragedy shape us? How do bad things grow us? Physical pain, sucks. As I approach the big 3-0, my body is doing weird things. I used to get injured being active and dancing. Now I sneeze too hard, or sleep slightly wrong and I’m in pain for 5 whole days. However, emotional pain has nothing on physical pain. And this is coming from someone who was in labor for like 3 days. Emotional pain is something we have tried to describe. Writers everywhere have tried to come up with metaphors for emotional pain since Biblical times. Although some come close, no one can truly describe how it feels to have tragedy strike and feel the emotional pain. It’s a lesson we as believers have always heard and want to reconcile. We try to encourage those going through hard times with lessons of perseverance, lessons of endurance, of “running the good race” and “fighting the good fight.” We teach on Job, and how he lost everything and still praised God. None of this is new, but it helps. ...

Remember when I kept up with my blog? More importantly: remember when I thought I was going to simplify this year? I told you all I was going to keep things focused on 1 word: simple. My life, my goals, my home, my job, my thoughts- KEEP IT SIMPLE. Have I done that at all? If you think that I have, you must be new here. It's literally one month away from being 2019, and I have been anything but simple this year. I changed schools. We continued to gather clutter. We have yet to get a grip on our finances. I still overthink every little thing I do. My house is a constant disaster area. My new school has been a challenge at every step. Personal challenges and relationships have been a struggle. I have done everything except keep it "simple" this year. In every sense of my "simple" goal, I failed. Sure, I have a month left. So I could get back on track. I could try my best to simplify what I can. But sometimes, I feel like I try so hard to NOT try so...

You would think that our first Christmas with a baby would be the most exciting, over the top, Christmas ever. And yet, our tree is not up yet. Chock it up to 2 working parents if you must, but I have a strong feeling that it's a little more than that.  The holidays have been a strange mix for me, the last couple of years. I've been equal parts "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year" and "You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch." It could have been just a getting older thing, it could be because my mom passed away a couple years ago, or it could be that seasonal effective disorder thing people often ignore during this time. It's probably a mix of all 3. No matter what it is, I usually just ignore it and try to focus on the Holly Jolly Christmas stuff. It's hard though, right? There's a lot of stuff going on. I'm not going to bore you with a list, because you all have a list too. We all have a lot of stuff going on. I'm not going ...

I sit here nursing the Bebe, trying to get him to sleep, I can’t help to reflect on all the things God has been teaching me recently. I think about things a lot while nursing. Because, yes it’s such an incredible bonding experience, but it’s also a quiet time of peace for this mama. I can’t help but wonder, how am I doing? Not as a mama, but as Elisa. How am I doing as Elisa Hernandez? It’s a weird question but I’m often wondering about it. Too often I’m just going through the motions. Too often I’m left sinking in the shadows of what my mission is here on earth. I want more than anything to persue my mission here on earth, which is clear to me as a Bible believing follower of Christ: make disciples. What would happen if all those who claim the name of Jesus started acting upon the mission God has called them too? What would happen if we stopped just taking from God, and gave back to Him in our efforts? God doesn’t need us and yet He chooses us. What if we stopped putting God...

Money, y'all. We know that the love of money is the root of all evil. It's a little disheartening to have a 2 income household and still be on the struggle bus with money. And we're pretty thrifty too. I've been trained to go for the best deals, the best coupons, the lowest prices, and to sacrifice quality when needed. Would I love to shop in the organic, all natural section more? Uh duh. But this crunchy mama is more of a crispy mama, due to her budget.  And yet, even in our thriftiness, we have been struggling with money. A couple of unforeseen circumstances came up: After the babe was born, we knew our insurance premiums would go up. But they went WAAAY up. Like, into the stratosphere up. Like, "wow I didn't know they could be that high" up.  We had a lot of medical expenses after pushing the baby out, and we spent a day in the Phoenix Children's hospital after he was born.  I'm a teacher, so I already make basically nothing. I also ha...

Why blog now? It’s funny- I had so many thoughts about so many things before I sat down at my computer. Stuff about being a mom, and a teacher, and a wife. But now that I’m here, trying to make them coherent and relatable, I’m coming up short. Maybe there are too many coherent and relatable blogs out there. Maybe, there needs to be someone that says what NO ONE is thinking. Maybe, instead of people “telling it like it is” maybe we need people to just “tell it.” What happened to the freedom we had to just let go. As children, we were encouraged to have freedom in our playtime, our work time, our creative time. Then as we get older, we put boundaries on those things so the are coherent and relatable. But I think we forget to stop the the boundaries before we lose our freedom. Is anyone following me? Am I even following me? I’m honestly not trying to sound existential or transcendent. This is just what happens when I sit down and begin to write. I think it was in thea...