The one with a novel I'm writing??? I guess????

I'm writing a novel.

I have no idea where it is going and where it came from, but I am writing it nonetheless. I am still working out the main events and outline for this thing.

Guys.

I have no idea what I am doing.

This is like an actual novel and I really don't think it's going to even be good. I don't think it's going to make me much of any money. But I'm writing it.

It's loosely based on my life, very loosely. It's still fiction, but it has similar vibes.

The idea randomly came to me one random night and then since that moment I've just been pouring out the ideas for this story.

Writing is a wild thing. It's so personal and weird. I keep reading through what I have, thinking about how others might perceive this. But is that the way to do it? Or do you just put your story out there and see what happens? Do you just write it and simply not care how others see it and review it?

I'm not even sure I am physically able to do that. Can I just put work out there and just NOT care how the public receives it? I don't think I can do that. I hate thinking there are people out there that don't like my work. Especially something loosely based on my actual life, that seems so personal.

Anyway, this blog isn't a preview, or like an ad. I don't even know if it's going to be good. Heck, I don't even know if it's going to be finished. But it has been great being creative again. It has been nice to just pour creative power into something I really enjoy doing and then not having to "monetize" it, or trying to get it to sell or whatever.

Wait. Am I just describing a hobby? I think I might be. Just like a creative thing I like doing and not using it to pay my bills-- that's literally just a hobby.

Nothing wrong with hobbies, I guess I just didn't see writing as a hobby for me. It might be. It would be nice if it became more, but I am keeping my expectations low. Not "low," but realistic.

I'm 33. Sometimes we see people being more "successful" than us at a much younger age and feel very unaccomplished. But there is no timeline for anything. So if writing becomes a bigger thing later in my life- cool. If I just stay a normal human for the rest of my life- still cool! I got a lot of other things in my life that gives me joy, and I'm learning to be grateful for all of it.

But just in case I do become a famous author, here's a picture of me being obnoxious to my husband to humble me and remind me who I actually am:

No way she still is out here blogging like it's 2012.

Actually, yes she is. And she is NOT sorry. Slight update: I’ve been homeschooling and microschooling for the past couple years. I started my middle and high school microschool in my home in August 2024 and began homeschooling my boys simultaneously in August 2025. Now sitting here in January 2026, having done both for a full semester, and that feels great! This has been really great for myself and my husband, and my kids! So by all metrics, when people ask me how I am, the answer should be “ GREAT!” And normally it is. But the current world events feel really heavy. The tumultuous circumstances that continue, are hard to ignore and especially hard to not let it get you down. So that dichotomy between personally doing well and globally feeling like we are all falling apart has got me feeling really ✨reflective. ✨ Also, I learned recently that those sparkle emojis are a sign that AI is being used. Y’all. If you think any part of this is AI, you really don’t know me at all. An...

Mom, Musicals, and Mary Poppins

I’ve been thinking a lot about my mom lately. Probably because the anniversary of her death is coming up this month. March is always a lot: Leo's birthday, our wedding anniversary, her death anniversary. Wait. I also just realized November is similarly a lot: Uriah's birthday, my birthday, and my mom's birthday. Why can't huge life events we have no control over be more spread out throughout the year? Anyway. My mom loved musicals. LOVED musicals. Most people knew her as an amazing educator for children with special needs, as that was her career about which she was so passionate. But prior to that, she did a lot of local theater-- even making her way into Knott's Berry Farm's Birdcage Theater as a performer. Not sure what her role was, but I once saw a picture of her some red, saloon girl getup and didn't want anymore information, for the sake of my innocence. But yes, musicals and theater in general were something she enjoyed watching as well as being in!...

The one with pie.

This title is a little misleading. This blog will actually be about work. You know, that thing we all look forward to having a day off from. It’s still weird to think that I have an actual “career.” I mean, not as weird as being a parent, but still a strange concept for a person who still doesn’t feel like she’s made it into the adult world. This is my 5th year as a full time classroom teacher. It’s definitely not been easy. I’ve been through anxiety, depression, coming in early, staying super late, grading on any free time I have, crying on my lunch breaks, quitting mid year, parent complaints, thousands of hours of professional development, long term sub problems, breaking up fights, de-escalating situations, sassy teenagers, hormonal teenagers, emotional teenagers, hard situations, mandatory reporting, and of course getting BARELY above the minimum wage for all of this. I don’t go through that list to get pity or sympathy or encouragement. I go through this to let ...

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